This is lengthy section is designed to assist you in navigating the ‘territory’ that you discover about yourself while receiving Sacred Body Rites.
Please take your time; thoroughly study this with your open receptive body, and not with your mind.
Emotions are stored in the yoni as armor. These emotions are a living substance comprised of somatic memories of past experiences, or projections into future all of which make up ego’s separate sense of a ‘self.’ A significant portion of ego’s ‘separate self’ is constellated as a psychological complex derived from personal past experiences, and as energies the body absorbs from our western ancestral hypermasculine heritage that has been encoded by the limbic system, and is held somatically body-wide as armor.
Most of these energies are stored as armor in the genital area.
The psychological complex stored as armor in the genitals is comprised of emotions from cumulative past heartbreaks, abuse, trauma, self-hatred, disappointments, or of romanticized fantasies with lovers, or projections onto future lovers. The power of these emotions tighten our genital tissues, which cloud our capacity to sense with presence the subtler flow of Eros. Emotions are encoded deep in the subconscious by the limbic system; they are brought to consciousness by the brain’s limbic system whenever anything we contact resembles the energetic tone of the event or story: when we are triggered somatically we then project onto another – this can be evoked by thoughts, ideas, memory, smell, taste, sight, place, situation, person, and most potently by objectifying touch to the armor in the yoni.
Once a projection is triggered somatically, the body automatically behaves exactly as though the past is now, having little to do with who is actually present. When this projected somatic experience automatically arises, we unconsciously bodily repeat an action if it is a pleasant event from the past, or, we avoid a behavior by distancing, or holding back in reactivity if it was unpleasant.
If this complex – which Barry Long calls the emotionally drenched ‘self’ of projection – takes over while celebrating Sacred Body Rites, or during Conscious Love with your Sacred Consort, the pleasurable sensations of Eros in your inner body disappear and recede into the background, and are replaced by strong emotions, feelings, thoughts, and behaviors that mimic the past experience – be it old abuse or memories of pleasure. Meanwhile, awareness is thrown out of the present through automatic bodily motions that ‘confess’ either grasping or rejection as various forms of bodily expressed dissociation. We are no longer present in NOW, and we are unable to sense arousal or the subtle erotic inner-body sensations in the present – because sensing The Love is possible only in NOW – as opposed to a past or projected state that is drenched with emotions, feelings, thoughts that unconsciously ‘behave us.’
Due to the magnetic nature of the female flesh, women are more bodily vulnerable to absorbing electric-charged armor and are more deeply infected by the cultural hypermasculine disposition. Male flesh is more electric and discharges. Therefore, if a woman has had sex with men who use her to ‘get from’ in aggressive and dominating ways, or use her as an object to practice sophisticated sexual techniques, then her yoni absorbs these electric energies from him. A woman’s mouth, breasts, perineum, rectum, labia, clitoris, vagina, cervix, and uterus become loaded with emotional and physical tension, pain, and stress that accumulate from old wounds of abuse, domination, and the emotional ownership of her libido by a lover, or father. Armor will become the normal state of her yoni.
Subsequently, like an infection caught from a man, she will need to release her built-up tension and armor in her yoni during sex, or through masturbation via clitoral stimulation to achieve a surface orgasm that leaves her unsatisfied and depressed.
Signs of the presence of armor in the yoni manifest as feelings of restlessness, discontent, confusion, ungroundedness, rapidly changing emotions and moods, sexual hunger, predatory ‘maneater’ behavior, frigidity, control of sex, and control of her man’s libido, jealousy, inability to be with intensity, or the opposite extreme: distancing from intimacy, sexual numbness (the absence of sensation) in the breast, mouth, anus, vagina, and cervix. Sometimes all of these can be present at the same time in different configurations. Talk about feelings of confusion!
Having sex with a man who is over-influenced by the hypermasculine builds armor in a woman’s yoni and she will exhibit aggressive, rapid motions, often to the point of dissociation. Meanwhile, her unconscious, ego-driven predatory ‘getting from’ behavior – that man infected her with – overwhelms her capacity to be present to sense the subtler, slower, micro-sensations of Love’s sensuous inner-body flow. A woman’s yoni under the guidance of Love expresses subtle micro-motions in her flesh. When there’s a blurring of presence while making love, it not only adds tension and trauma to her mouth, breasts, perineum, rectum, labia, clitoris, vagina, cervix, and uterus to further numb or overstimulate her, also, she will miss the micro-nuances of Love’s subtle sensuous sweetness and beauty that flows throughout her body and expresses in her flesh, which her Consort is also deprived of.
From another perspective, since the beginning of her sexual maturity women have been culturally taught to entertain romantic daydreams and idealized fantasies about lovers and lovemaking to produce the excitement and tension needed to achieve clitoral orgasm, which increases the armor in the perineal, rectal, vaginal, cervical, and uterine tensions. Surface depression, remorse, disappointment, and emptiness arises after your man has had his ejaculation in you, or after you have had a clitoral orgasm from sex or masturbation.
While masturbating, practice whole-body inner breathing and sense the qualities in your inner-body space; meanwhile, maintain presence to your sensations. During heightened build-up of arousal or amid intensity of your sensations, emotions, feelings, thoughts, fantasies, or during orgasm, continue to practice whole-body inner breathing, and inhabit your whole body space by sensing. Open your heart space to receive the sensations of orgasmic intensity so they can spread from the genitals and fill your whole inner body space. Slow down your stroking tempo to sense the subtle sensuous, micro-motions of your Eros: let those sensations guide you in your erotic bodily expressions.
The subtle sensations of Eros will lead you to an orgasm possessing a higher order of coherence that expresses throughout your whole body, and beyond into cosmic dimensions.
Much of our difficulty with celebrating Sacred Body Rites, or Conscious Love arises from fear of repeating past traumas, abuse, heartbreaks, disappointments, disillusionments, self-betrayals, and to avoid repeating painful emotional experiences with lovers, or from memories of unsatisfying love-making or abuse. Also, if we have over romanticized what Love is we may have built a fantasy world made of projection. We try with all our might to make romantic love work, based on our projections onto another of who they are not! This is compounded by the degree we have been influenced by the ancient cultural hypermasculine disposition – our ancestral-genetic heritage of hatred of the feminine, the body, and the Sacred Earth. However, on an unconscious level we are also terrified of our Eros, of our desire, and particularly our arousal.
All these cumulative energies create armor that consolidate into a single energetic-psychic-emotional complex that forms the emotionally drenched ‘self’ of ego. This emotional ‘me’ is afraid of the power of Eros. Therefore we control the sensuous expressions in our body as arousal builds by splitting the body into sections of armor that is filled with tension; mainly in the mouth, throat, solar plexus, and perineal-genital area. All painful or pleasant experiences encoded by the brain’s limbic system are stored in the body, and most particularly in the mouth, throat, perineum, rectal, and genital areas. Barry Long in his book, “Making Love” says if the emotionally drenched self is in charge of our intimacy, it will co-opt our sensuous expressions and shift celebrating of Sacred Body Rites or Conscious Love into having sex solely for self-gratification. By the use of fantasy, foreplay, and a hyper-focus on clitoral orgasm and ejaculation, we loose the ability to celebrate Conscious Love in the present as a sensuous, whole inner body, cosmic process.
The Power of the Bonding Instinct in Women:
We may be afraid to let the power of The Love rise from the yoni to the solar plexus and heart, and let Love have her way with us without control because of fear of our past. The armor in our body is overreactive and can trigger ‘tissue excuses,’ and expressions of the ‘bonding instinct.’ Therefore, we may come up with VERY good reasons backed by strong emotional feelings as to why we cannot let Love ‘have us,’ nor surrender to Love, or continue receiving Sacred Body Rites.
There are plenty of STRONG emotions and feelings in the armored genital tissues that bring up powerful thoughts and feelings to convince us to not fully open to Love. Besides armor that harbors the unconscious emotionally drenched tissues in the mouth, throat, perineum, yoni, cervix-uterus, rectum, and penis mentioned by Barry Long in his book “Making Love” there’s also the overwhelming female bonding instinct that drives procreation that convince us that opening to Love is risky.
For a female who is able to have a baby, bonding is a genetic IMPERATIVE. It is the most powerful impediment in a woman that prevents TOTAL surrender to The Love if she is unaware of it. The bonding instinct is designed to drive procreation; it is the deepest physical instinct, arising from the genetics of every cell. Therefore, it takes ferocious, heroic presence to see through this bonding impulse. Why? Because every procreative hormone responds to ‘the one’ male ‘out there’ who will give you the seed to create your baby. “I am saving all my love for ‘him’ – I cannot possibly surrender to The Love inside. What would happen if I did surrender to the inner Love? Who would I be? How can I possibly stand in my sovereign dignity in this Love – AS this Love?” Fortunately, there is a portal out of this dilemma that leads to a new way of living – let’s look.
If you want to explore a feminine version of Eden that lovingly, erotically connects with everything, then it is important to cultivate a recognition of the hypermasculine complex. It helps to cultivate unwavering presence to your inner body sensations so you can ‘be with’ all the disembodied hypermasculine aspects of your conditioned self.
Ultimately this means we consciously indentify and unite with everything that we are.
The hypermasculine complex – as ego – sits aloof in the head, above the body, and looks ‘down’ upon the separate, objectified ‘body.’ Hypermasculine ego regards our precious body as a despised pack animal designed for our use: a mere lump that is not worthy of love, or a sack that we can barely tolerate and have to drag around with us. Then add onto that the new age ‘neo-advaitic,’ ‘non-dual’ perspective that “the body is not real, only the spirit is real!” (This may be a source of modern negative body image issues). This contrived spiritualized so-called ‘non-dual’ disposition is actually dualistic because it rejects half of reality – the feminine, the body, the sensual, and all of manifest creation. From this neo-advaitic disposition, consciousness is the only reality; an unfeeling witness that sends its light of intelligence as an objectifying, distancing consciousness “into the body” from above. This consciousness is devoid of feeling, and has no capacity for the tears of compassion, empathy, and love. It projects into the body from above yet, still maintains its distance by seeing but not feeling the sensations, emotions, and feelings that lurk ‘down there’ as uncomfortable aspects of self. This is a ‘spiritualized,’ hypermasculine consciousness that fears Love, and it avoids feeling the feminine by controlling or avoiding the body’s sensations. Thus, ego exploits the feminine needs, desires, longings, tenderness, sweetness, Eros, innocence, and power, and it perpetrates upon her body a self-hateful disposition (see Recognition of Hypermasculine, under ‘Both Sexes’).
Body is the Radiant Vessel of the Divine Feminine, emanating the original Indestructible Innocence of Criatura.
Body is none other than the most refined physical expression of The Love of the Tender Mother.
However, when our consciousness is controlled by this hypermasculine, unfeeling witness consciousness it objectifies body, and subjects her to forms of self-hatred that create inaccurate body image distortions, eating disorders, self punishment practices, self-violent communications, etc. Then our body’s vulnerability, innocence, openness, sweetness, and emanation of Love retreats, and becomes deeply buried in unconscious hatred. When these intensified, unconscious energies accumulate, they will build-up and go underground to become an inner swamp that eventually has to explode due to the pressure created by suppressing Love’s power. The intensity of pressure built-up from self-hatred, fear, doubt, and by controlling Love has to go somewhere. This creates a powerful psychological complex, what Barry Long calls the ‘fiendess’ in a woman – and what I call the ‘enraged killer’ in a man.
Repressed Love, and control of the sensations of our Eros when not allowed to flourish as authentic physical expressions turn into armor that can manifest mysterious illnesses of all sorts: physical, mental, psychological, and spiritual. These symptoms can also express as various forms of bodily self-harm, negative body self-image distortions, eating disorders, self-hatred, self-violent communications that come from the inner critic, feelings of disdain toward our ever-changing chaotic moods, inner instability, restlessness, confusion, lack of ground, irritability, inability to be with intensity, confusion with no sense of ground, center, or direction. Erratic behaviors and emotional outbursts that arise from hypermasculine repression and control are not pretty, as you well know if you have ever experienced the fiendess in a woman, or the enraged killer in a man. Barry Long in his CD, ‘Making Love’ fiercely warns us that when the fiendess explosively expresses herself, rarely can a man stand up to her, and he will allow himself to be castrated to avoid her wrath. Long’s observation is brilliant, and the same applies to a woman with respect to facing the enraged killer in man. Further, and even more important, Long says, “Until you know the fiendess, (or the enraged killer) you cannot know love.”
Therefore, the way out of this predicament is to clearly, unflinchingly see, be with, and most importantly, sense all aspects of ourselves – as they are; while at the same time to let it be, and remain unwaveringly present to sensations as ‘the given’ in undefended open-heartedness. The hypermasculine consciousness affects us all, and its influence penetrates deep in the unconscious all the way into our cells, beginning at conception!
Refrain from negatively labeling and harshly judging the hypermasculine consciousness, or criticizing your ever-changing emotions, fluctuating states, bodily and human needs, feelings, or your behavior. Recognize it, admit it, be with it, and sense.
The way through this powerful portal is to sense your inner body sensations amid intensity or intimacy – be with it, and leave it as it is. To be with your sensations – as intensity or intimacy – in relaxed openheartedness restores the balance toward the positive masculine. This Sacred Masculine practice: free-flowing attention, unwavering sensing presence to inner body sensations, amid a tender open heart inherently possesses Love for ‘what is’ with utter feeling, and inner body receptivity to all that the feminine emanates. Receiving the sensations as ‘what is’ – ‘the given’ about yourself – is the only way I know for the hypermasculine disposition to shift its control over our Eros and let Love be in charge. Once Eros is freed, Love unites with your attention, frees it, and your body returns to a primordial state, expressing as an Innocent Fount of Radiant Love.
It so happens that you model the Positive Sacred Masculine by practicing free-flowing attention, and sensing presence to inner body sensations in unwavering, open hearted spaciousness that welcomes all expressions of Love ‘to be.’ Cultivate receptive, openhearted, sensing presence for whatever sensations the feminine manifests – be it an expression of the inner or outer woman: To let her be here, just as she is, invites Love to freely emanate throughout woman’s body as her Radiant Glorioiusa.
This positive masculine practice gradually quiets the inner war, and the resulting inner harmony creates free space in which the inner feminine – as Love – ventures out to play more and more. Love begins to emanate as sensuousness from inside the woman’s inner body space, which unites all spiritual, psychic, emotional, and bodily separation. In turn, this heals the fragmented hypermasculine dissociation of consciousness. Once the fragmented parts of male consciousness reunites with The Love as a gift from a woman, it restores a man to his rightful place of offering his ‘dynamic sensing presence as holder of opposites.’
Your inner Positive Sacred Masculine emanates a grounded, deeply relaxed, present, sensing awareness inside your body. It bestows bodily relaxation, inner safety, love-suffused sensuous presence, confidence in Being, and Trust in now, and you enjoy a harmonious embodied inner sensuous relationship with the inner feminine. Jung characterizes this as a birth that occurs after the death of the ‘Hero’ (hypermasculine). Then the ‘Coniunctio’ or Sacred Union between the Sacred Masculine and Divine Feminine gives birth to the Divine Inner Child who expresses the Original Innocence of Criatura – the body in its primordial state as Sacred Vessel as Holy Grail.
Unwavering sensing presence provides infinite space for all expressions of the feminine.
This alchemical substance transubstantiates and restores body to its natural state as Holy Grail.
Your life will never be the same after your body becomes a continuous fount of infinite Love that is in erotic connection with everything. This is enfleshment from which you cannot go back to the trance of a virtual hypermasculine life.
Enfleshment is an actual realized state in which your body becomes Love, and this Sacred Union between body and Love will stabilize in you as you repeatedly bodily experience feeling loved:
When receiving the intimate touch of Sacred Body Rites, see if you can let in the rapture of the sensuous inner flow of Love as it emanates inside your inner body space. Let Love have you. Allow Love to suffuse your three centers – head, heart, pelvis, and your flesh amid all self-violent inner dialogue that arises … then, Love will suffuse your flesh as Sacred Union.
This practice increases Loves’ presence that breathes sensuousness throughout your inner body space, which so thoroughly suffuses your flesh with rapture that your body is devoured by Love.
Every day, whenever you can find quiet time, abide in your personal inner-body Stillness, and sense the sensations in your inner body space. In inner Stillness, sense and be with the subtle nuances of the sensations of your inner body – as the sensations of Love’s Breath flowing in your inner body space. When Love’s sensuous flow express in your inner body, open to the sensations, receive them, take the sensations in, let them have you, and tend them by orienting your awareness inward to anchor your embodied sensing presence with the sensations of Love.
Your disposition is receptive, openhearted, undefended, sensual, in loving regard – you utterly die into Love – you ask Love to:
“Take me as much as you give yourself to me.”
This ‘death of control’ gives birth to unbroken inner contact with the sensuous flow of Love.
To maintain contact with the inner sensations of Love, live your life in synchrony with the slower tempo of your inner body sensations, and adjust your life-pace accordingly so you can remain present, inwardly oriented, in contact with Love’s subtle inner body micro-nuances of Breath, and bodily live this Love. You have a specific portal to intimacy through the inner-body tone of Stillness by which you can live this Love while you are in the marketplace:
To orient inwardly, and live in a slow inner tempo in sensuous contact with Loves’ inner body flow is the secret to living in Eden while fully living your life inside the hypermasculine matrix.
Another powerful practice for restoring body to its original Indestructible Innocence as Sacred Vessel of Love is to receive into yourself the sensations while being bodily loved through Intimate Touch during Sacred Body Rites, or while making Conscious Love with your Sacred Consort.
If you bodily open, trust, surrender, and fully receive the sensuousness of Love that flows as Eros in your inner body unconditionally, amid all the protests of the hypermasculine, you will enjoy an extremely powerful alchemy for bodily healing and wholeness of being:
We are all afraid of our Eros, of our desire, and we are terrified of arousal! Therefore, we dare not allow the sensuousness of Love, nor will we surrender unconditionally to receive Love, or let it in during intimate touch for fear of self-violent communication, and re-experiencing hypermasculine’s brutal self-punishments.
Receptivity to arousal to build your erotic sensuousness is ‘the walk’ of unwaveringly being with, and sensing all the intensity – of fear, hatred, suspicion, doubt, recoil, control, false boundaries, spiritual by-pass, desire, or arousal – while you are being touched, without acting on any of it.
Sacred Body Rites restores body to its Original Indestructible Innocent state:
Criatura is Holy Grail, brimming with Mother Love for the benefit for all creation.
The Sacred Mystery of ‘body’ is its power to vulnerably emanate Tender Mother Love.
Love unites all fragmented aspects of consciousness, restoring it to Wholeness.
Consciousness, when made Whole, provides the space to further evolve Love.
This is the Secret Sacred Marriage that never ends.
To bodily open to, and receive our sensations, desire, longing, and arousal that is present during Sacred Body Rites you need to feel bodily safe, which requires that you feelingly inhabit your inner body space. ‘Feeling safe’ is not an outside job, having to to with the the environment or the behavior of another we have objectified ‘out there.’ Rather, feeling safe arises by being in your body and sensing the qualities therein to realize how that feels safe.
As mentioned, inhabiting your inner body space with sensing awareness is different from looking down into the body from above with an unfeeling witness consciousness and sending love ‘down there.’ Practice trust with yourself, and with your Sacred Consort with whom you are celebrating Sacred Body Rites. Your partner must be in impeccable contact with his authentic boundaries, and be guided by the sensuous inner flow of Love that he fiercely abides in, in unwavering sensing presence inside himself.
He touches you without projection, and does not leak his desire and need into your body as an object; nor does he energetically penetrate inside your inner body space in order to fix you, heal you, move your energy, balance your chakras, ‘do to,’ or ‘get’ self-gratification from you.
When you are touched by a vertically aligned man who inwardly abides inside his inner body space, amid his authentic boundaries – via his resting inside the dynamic tension of opposites, then your inner feminine flow of sensuousness of Eros Body – as Love – feels free to arise, emanate, come out to play, and suffuse your whole inner body space with soft, sweet, orgasmic, sensuous ecstasy, and arousal amid increasing depth of intimacy and intensity.
Receiving your sensuous inner erotic flow increases the potency of your Eros, suffusing it with The Love that restores bodily flesh to its original state as Holy Grail – Criatura
While receiving intimate touch, not only do you allow yourself to bodily enjoy the sensuousness, the erotic splendor, desire, longing, and arousal, you also practice unconditionally being with any hypermasculine intensity or powerful emotions that arise inside you. This includes all the objectification, separation, naming, labeling, spiritual by-pass, self-violent communications, self-hatred, suspicion, undeserving, guilt, fear: of being deluded, tricked, abused, or having doubts about this practice as being ‘wrong,’ and that the evoked feelings of Eros, need, desire, longing, arousal, and Love is ‘bad,’ as well as the projections we put on the Consort as abuser, perpetrator, the Lover, etc….and on it goes. These energies will arise yet the practice is to maintain presence to sense them without acting, or reacting, to them. In other words we do not let these energies ‘behave us.’
The practice of abiding in the ‘dynamic tension of opposites’ means you can feelingly be with any intensity, intimacy, or paradox weather it is recoil, avoidance, shut down, or deeply erotic orgasmic sensations, powerful desire, arousal, fear, rage, abuse, etc., whatever it is, you let it be inside, as it is, without projecting it onto an object: a situation, or your consort – ‘out there’ and then acting on it as your guidance.
Not acting on your projected thought and emotions is a huge threshold to cross, and few ever cross it: to not be bodily controlled by, or act based on emotions and thoughts the are based on the past; instead to be moved by the sensations arising from the inner body space.
This process of abiding in your innerness, and being with sensations of intensity or intimacy, reverses the direction of Love – from ‘up and out’ of the body into separation – to ‘inside and down’ into the body until all your cells unite with Love.
While abiding in your innerness, the energy of Love implodes inside the cells as the potency of Love’s Radiance into the inner body space that then suffuses all your cells with ‘The Love that unites all things’ and which is felt as an erotic connection with all that is.
Practice free-flowing attention, amid unwavering presence, by being with the sensations of intensity and intimacy that arise inside – ecstatic or uncomfortable – and letting it be as it is without adding self-critical commentary to the already critical commentary is what gradually heals the hypermasculine imbalance, and restores Wholeness to body as a realized irrevokable union of Love and Consciousness.
By now, you get the fundamental importance of healing the hypermasculine disposition that objectifies and creates the dissociative, body-mind split, and spiritual by-pass. Without recognition of the hypermasculine, utter bodily union with Love, as enfleshment, is fantasy.
Precise details of how to offer Sacred Body Rites are contained in the training manual given to you if you choose to Mentor and Apprentice in Sacred Body Rites.
Barry Long says there is not a man alive who is not compelled to masturbate even when living with a fully active sexual partner. However, when Love awakens in the man’s body through regular practice of letting Love be in charge of his penis while inside his partner’s vagina, his need for ejaculation will gradually subside. Meanwhile, until that occurs, he can help the matter by masturbating without inner images, or he only uses inner images of the vagina, and not use fantasies of inner pictures of women’s faces.
A practice I recommend to men is to maintain sensing presence in your inner body space – by whole-body inner breathing through the inner breathing portal in the perineum and genitals. When you practice this while masturbating it spreads the ejaculatory intensity from the penis to the whole inner body space in which whole body orgasms occur without ejaculation. If you ejaculate, do not lay a guilt trip on yourself; keep guilt out of it, says Long.
When a man’s penis is not surrendered to Love, he will be over-excitable and can become sexually aggressive and domineering at the slightest hint of sex. A hypermasculine driven male is helpless to his animal, testosterone-driven need to procreate – which reveals the inherent cruelty in woman’s teasing and flirting with him, and her irresponsible disposition toward man’s inherent sexual-animal nature, which perpetuates a vicious cycle.
If both man and woman are driven by their emotionally drenched complexes and are possessed by hypermasculine consciousness without Love, a vicious cycle ensues: man is compelled to ‘get from her,’ through aggressive, dominating sex without Love, and he often suffers premature ejaculation that abruptly ends the possibility of a woman celebrating any Love with him.
Woman in turn, increasingly develops unconscious fear of man’s hypermasculine aggression and his unconscious hatred of the feminine. She feels hateful-in-kind toward the man for having sex without loving her, and she will tease and withhold from him, which thereby increases man’s frustration, and deepens his aggressive and dominating behavior toward her out of his hatred for the feminine for her not giving her Love to him…. Acting out this vicious cycle during intercourse, or while withholding, both collapse and defer to a self-created mutual fantasy inside themselves, out of which each will use the other to self-gratify through genital orgasm without Love. There is no ability through fantasy, in the dissociative frenzy of exuberance, automaticity of bodily motions, and static filled intensity therein, to sense the sensuous nuances and subtle, erotic body sensations of Love flowing in the inner body space.
A man who have been subjected to a woman’s ‘feindess’ – or a woman who out of jealousy attempts to emotionally control her man’s libido through teasing and then withholding – enters a powerful emotional complex known as ‘castration terror.’ Many men will do anything to avoid the perceived terror of ‘castration’ that harkens back to circumcision. However, once a man feels castrated, he becomes deflated in his creative drive in life.
There are many men we can observe who are trapped in this complex, and it is one of the cruelest acts one person can do to another – to take away ones vitality in the name of compliance to another’s manipulative will over them.
When a man’s intimate partner feels she owns his libido, she does not trust him, and suspects his activities, is jealous of him if he associates with any other women, and is fearful of loosing her man then, her feindess will rear its controlling strategies over his libido by wielding her sexual power over his sex drive. This control is expressed through teasing and tormenting him with the promise of sex and then withdrawal of it, by jealousy, rage attacks, and even violence. Most men cannot stand up to a woman’s fiendess therefore, he will not confront her. He becomes her emasculated slave to escape her volatile emotions and onslaught of cruel punishments. Fortunately Sacred Body Rites sessions with a female practitioner can provide a portal out of this complex through Sacred Touch of the testicles, penis, prostate, and perineum. A woman can be healed by a male Sacred Body Rites practitioner in the same way.
Love does not contain projection, or over-excitement, even during an orgasm. Orgasm will come for both partners when Love deems it so. Orgasm inside Love is a pure whole-body sensory experience that expresses as prolonged, repeating inner waves of sensuous erotic intensity that gradually builds in a quiet, precious, and beautiful way. There will be no trying, no wanting, no getting to, no attachment, and no hurry. Rather, there will be direct sensation of ever-growing pleasure and beauty in the now.
Whole-body orgasm with ejaculation under the charge of Love in unwavering feeling presence becomes a powerful quantum ignition that increases the potency of Love’s embodiment to a depth, degree, and on new level of coherence:
Whole body orgasm leads to Love’s deeper enfleshment.
Both lovers unite in the eternal present where Love is all that is. They mutually enjoy Union with Love inside themselves while united with each other’s flesh. Here, spiritual union and the Consort’s united flesh becomes indistinguishable from Love, or from each other’s flesh. Union is so potent it is as though the flesh-to-flesh interchange of Love continues despite that the physical bodies have separated and are no longer physically celebrating Conscious Love. Each partner reports the distinct sense of physical enfleshed union while celebrating Conscious Love that continues unabated despite being separate physically (See enfleshment).
Now contains no self: it is consciousness, which is Love. Consciousness transmutes physical love making into Celebrating Spiritual Love to realize Sacred Union with all that is – all the way into the flesh.
By celebrating Conscious Love often and regularly, there will be an increase in Stillness and peace, and a decrease of emotionality and anxiety in the day-to-day lives of the lovers. Eventually, over a prolonged practice of celebrating Conscious Love, the lovers will feel that they are living as one flesh united as One Love:
Fully living life as a Sensuous journey is as though Consorts are bodily immersed in the ocean of an embryonic fluid of Love.
The vagina that is open, present, still, soft, wet, effortless, innocent, receptive, passive, and undetermined is a living organ of Love. It becomes an awakened Yoni-Heart that lovingly absorbs into her vagina all the aggression and frustrations of man. A woman with an awake Yoni-Heart is capable of transmuting the world with her infinite Love.
The penis is a living intelligent organ of Love. When man can give to his Consort his unwavering sensing presence while abiding in Stillness with his undefended open heart, he will bodily receive and absorb through his penis all the energetic tensions held as armor in his Consort’s mouth, lips, anus, vagina, cervix, and uterus so she can release her old pains and emotionality. Her entire Yoni-Heart will increasingly soften while he remains stable, present, unrushed, gentle, open hearted, and undefended to receive and bodily absorb her energies.
Eventually, her precious feminine energies of Love will arise, gather, and release from her Yoni-Heart. Love suffuses her whole body and transmits Love to her male Consort. In turn, man’s consciousness becomes more stable, present, and whole – able to gather and receive more energies of Love with the magnetic, illuminative power of his penis, and he can behold and absorb them despite the near unbearable radiance, beauty, sensuousness, and glorious splendor of Love.
Can a man receive and bodily absorb, as his gift to her, the complete surrender of woman’s precious Love, which is her ultimate gift to him? His capacity to be present with her Love displays his spiritual capacities as a man.
Only what he can take, can she give. Take me as much as you give yourself to me.
After sufficient practice in celebrating Conscious Love, when emotionality is no longer in control, Consorts can let go of the practice of no foreplay recommended by Barry Long and outlined in the Sacred Body Rites training manual, and enjoy Love Play.
Let Love be in charge during touch, kissing, oral, and anal Love. Consorts joyously discover a new delight in oral and anal Love when practiced as Conscious Love. It reveals that the mouth and anus of the female are secret chambers that when opened like a flower become aspects of Yoni-Heart that completes the circuit of Yoni-Heart as a total ascent and descent of the currents of Love which utterly unite.
Long says, that man adores woman’s yoni as the Holy Shrine, the eye of God that he worships in holy reverence. Touching, kissing, gazing, and entering the Holy Shrine with his fingers to further soften the muscular walls and membranes of the vagina as a Divine act in which God – as Love – is more deeply revealed. Woman may practice fully receiving man’s worship of her, breathing in its impact through the pores of her whole body to sense the inner flow of Love therein.
Woman receives the Holy Shivic Power in man by fondling and placing his penis in her mouth, alternating between moving with the flow of Love and remaining in total Stillness. If man does not go into excitability and remains inwardly still, then she can absorb vast unwavering consciousness, become opened, and blossom into the infinite Black Stillness of the Absolute – as she dissolves into and becomes One Love.
Based on the intermix between the various enfoldments of inner body flow and ‘non-separate’ matter that emerges and becomes present inside Pure Breath of Love, we can perceive at what point along the spectrum of surrender of ‘self/Self’ that has opened to an utter bodily suffusion of Pure Breath of Love.
We ascertain this by noticing resistance, fight, or triggering into projection that we demonstrate amid intensity or intimacy. ‘Fight’ manifests as quick, automatic reactions to what is. In other words, when meeting an ‘edge’ of intensity or intimacy it triggers old habitual relational patterns of defense, avoidance, overwhelm, control, distancing, suspicion, vigilance, recoil, distraction, instability, irritability and arguments with life (what is), or by-pass, dissociation, shut down, projection onto the practitioner old abuse patterns in which they become the perpetrator and abuser, and so on.
Another revelation of where a person is on the spectrum of surrender to Love occurs when someone reveals their lifestyle to us: we hear that they over-will to push through life rather than flow with it, or they avoid and distract themselves to gain distance from feeling the tough issues. Their life styles are fundamentally stressful, hurry-worry driven, stuck in overdrive, chaos, overwhelm, with never enough time to get things done – we all know this place. This is an indicator that ones primary disposition is orientated to the horizontal – ego – rather than the vertical – Stillness – Spaciousness – Love. Receiving Stillness Touch sessions stabilize the inner body space, so we can relax out of our stuck patterns. We can be of service to others first, by being an example ourselves of a vertical orientation through our daily practice of sitting in Stillness, and second, by giving our Consorts inner-body practices that reconnect them to the vertical – to their inner body wisdom, to Stillness, and to Pure Breath of Love. Here, Eckhart Tolle characterizes someone who lives in a vertical orientation:
“Presence is a state of inner spaciousness. When you are present, you ask: How do I respond to the needs of this situation, of this moment, for the greater good of the whole? In fact, you don’t even need to ask the question. You are still, alert, and open to what is. You bring a new dimension into the situation: space. Then you look and you listen. Thus you become one with the situation. When instead of reacting against a situation, you merge with it, and the solution arises out of the situation itself. Actually, it is not you, the person, who is looking and listening, but the alert Stillness itself. Then, if action is possible or necessary, you take action or rather, right action happens through you. Right action is action that is appropriate to the whole. When the action is accomplished, the alert, spacious Stillness remains. There is nobody who raises his arms in a gesture of triumph shouting a defiant ‘Yeah!’ There is no one who says, ‘Look, I got that done.’ All creativity comes out of inner spaciousness. Once the creation has happened and something has come into form, you have to be vigilant so that the notion of ‘me’ or ‘mine’ does not arise: in other words, if you take credit for what you accomplished, the ego has returned, and the spaciousness has become obscured.”
How do we recognize the hypermasculine, and open to the positive masculine? Below, from an email I received, is a detailed characterization of how the hypermasculine sounds inside us. Brace yourself. This is a ferocious ‘know thyself’ depicting a recognition of the hypermasculine from a female Kali warrior:
“After my Stillness Touch session, I had a powerful unraveling wherein I realized that I projected all of my worst fears, my feelings of utter worthlessness, disease, eternal ‘badness’ on my osteopath. I contacted my own prison of shadows and self-imposed self-hatred, which then became a prism through which I experience the world. When the world is not there to defend itself against my default projections, they all come back to me flushing their bright and garish screens – my personalized times square of billboards – proclaiming how much I SUCK in fluorescent colors and many different languages.
And the scary thing is, the more the person matters to me, the more I hate myself in their presence – and my osteopath really left an impression on me as a healer and a teacher – and then he went silent. The truth is: I do not know why he did so, but I went straight to my dungeon and turned on the “He hates ‘me’ movie.”
It is devastating to see it so clearly after the session with you, because it is the reality of my existence right now. Despite being a beautiful girl with manifold of opportunities for being a healer, a lover, a mother, a wife, a muse, a human being who can rejoice at the sun, the flowers, the joy, and the privilege of being alive.
I spend my life mostly within the crushing walls of my dungeon, demanding that the world convince me that it doesn’t hate me, and it tries, but it can’t, and I spiral right into the pit of the cauldron, and I don’t know what to do Charles. I do not know how to lift this spell off myself, pardon myself, let myself out of prison, and begin to live my precious life.
So my osteopath is a great healer after all, he gave me what I need (whether he knows it or not) because I could have come and lay on his table week after week, but those walls grow back because no one but me can dispel them for me. So far, for all my experiences, and healings, and blessings, and journeys, I always find myself back in the dungeon – isolated from the world by own projections of worthlessness.”
Who cannot relate to this inner tirade of self-violent communication? I sure can.
I remember how grueling it felt when I committed to unwaveringly recognize and unconditionally be with and feel my near-constant self-violent, self-critical, inner dialogue, and catch the self-hateful attitude I had toward the feminine, my body, thoughts, emotions, and my fluctuating will forces.
My body was something I barely tolerated because it was ‘not real’ when compared to ‘real’ spirit. I still have some self-forgiveness to navigate here: I cringe over how I abused my body’s precious will-forces for selfish gain through strategies of covert seduction, innuendo, and subtle manipulation of others libido upon which I fed. I shake my head in astonishment over how much I self-deprived due to spiritual notions that the feminine, body, and the sensuous was an impure distraction from ‘The Spiritual Path’ that hid how afraid of Love I was, and how undeserving of Love I felt. Even more humbling was when I chose to face, be with, stew inside, and unconditionally feel all my personal hypermasculine strategies, which were similar to what our Heroine described about herself in her email above. I am still regularly astonished at how much I project upon another who I want them to be based on my idealism, and then I feel disappointed when they are acting as themselves rather than acting out my projection of them.
In our culture, we have all experienced at one time or another some level of disembodiment, disconnect, and distancing. This manifests as various forms: mind is separate from body, which, in turn places us out of touch with the feelings of the heart and the sensations of the pelvis. When not present to sensations in the body, we do not perceive the pulsations of the Sacred Earth, or the infinite sensuous field of one living substance that pervades all that is: these are aspects of one spectrum. The embodiment practices we offer will help you more consistently inhabit yourself in presence, and stabilize your awareness to remain present to the ever-unfolding stream of life – as sensation – in a more fully embodied way.
Essentially, these sensing practices will help you contact the sensuous wisdom of the body through the medium of stillness. By grounding in the stillness of heart and pelvis you will learn to open up your feeling presence to the sensation of the invisible flow of your own unfolding consciousness, and thereby meet the conditioned patterns that block your access to the body as a limitless sensation field of presence that is erotically one with all that is.
In your heart is a mysterious portal that interconnects the infinite ocean of Love to the sensuous consciousness in your body. Ground substance is the inner ocean of the body. It is a liquid connective tissue that pervades the inside and outside of every cell with consciousness, and unites the awareness of 50 trillion cells as one consciousness. So body as microcosm reflects macrocosm: our individual consciousness is an expression of 50 trillion cells which, in turn, is in direct contact with the infinite consciousness of the Whole. Paradoxically, by descending inward to heart we contact our inner ocean, which is one with the outer shimmering, pulsing oceanic heart of Mother Earth. Since the heart of mother earth is one with the infinite heart, we directly realize ourselves as one with Mother Love – all that is – expressed as body.
Inner body contact with Stillness reawakens the coherence of our heart field as infinite awareness of sensation through which we can evolve without limit. Most of us feel this inherently as a bodily knowing, even though we do not know how we know. The good news is your realization becomes more explicit by contacting your heart field.
Yet, to simply be with life’s sensuous unfolding, as it is, challenges us. How do we drop our pre-occupation with how life “ought” to be? Habitually clinging to our expectations creates static in the body’s liquid ground substance, which blurs our contact with the free-flow of life as sensation. At any moment, however, we can choose to relax and let ourselves be carried by the sensations of ever flowing now.
Another challenge is that rational mind takes the one essence that pervades all that is, and separates it from us. This ego disposition needs a subject and object – a ‘me’ and a ‘that.’ If everything in life is interconnected, then is the subject-object perspective a misperception? True, our bodies are separated by skin, and yet, each body is permeated by one presence that infuses into, and infinitely expands the boundaries of ‘body.’ As we can see, separating the body, presence, or sensations into parts creates a separate self, which can so deeply impact us that we feel separate from source. We subsequently loose sensuous contact with the now.
To surrender, relax control, rest in the disposition of ‘I don’t know,’ and then, fall into heart we arrive in the now. Our receptive presence to the inner sensations builds our basic trust in life’s inner streaming as it unfolds moment by moment. Meanwhile, the flow of now is free to be exactly as it is, and in our original innocence, we accept it.
Stillness Practices cultivate embodied sensing presence, and it turns out that whole-body felt sense of the tone of the inner body atmosphere – as sensation – is an unerring guide to this mystery. Whole-body felt sense is a function of our natural state that is one with the wisdom of the body and nature. This Sophia is sensuousness that expresses out of Absolute Stillness as the Eternal Feminine principle that unites all parts with the Whole, and links us to our boundless nature – as all that is. By relaxing into heart and contacting the sensuous, body unites with Soul, which erotically interconnects us with all life. This erotic union includes our senses, which unite as a sacred sense, Spiritual Touch – a conscious, embodied, felt, erotic contact with all that is.
Touching another while seated in this matrix we contact inner body sensation as a conscious, liquid, protoplasmic whole-body flow that breathes in ebb-tide fashion like the waves of an ocean. We realize that body’s sensuous ‘inner’ waves are one with the infinite ‘outer’ ocean of sensuous consciousness that pervades everything. While being touched we realize that by asserting that we have separate parts in separate bodies in denial of this sensuous unified flow in the body is like insisting that waves are not part of the ocean. This is how our ego’s separating sense becomes transparent to us when we touch, or are touched by another in natural state. We realize our natural state, from within body and retain our humanity and our differences without loosing contact with our common infinite divinity.
Repeatedly being touched from this natural disposition gradually restores to us our native heart perception by which we bodily realize the sensuous of wholeness as eros. That is why in my book Stillness health is redefined as wholeness, which is merely erotic conscious embodied contact with all that is. Rather than feeling bodily unrest, lack, fear, doubt, and dissatisfaction that result from orienting outwardly toward separateness, we, instead through Stillness Touch, realize embodied wholeness imbued with calm, trust, and confidence in being.
In summary, our inner orientation to sensation results in a wholeness that arises from embodied contact with the sensations of inner-body flow of Love that is connected with The Love that is all that is. The courage to cultivate the inner receptivity, be guided, and carried by the sensations of inner-body flow becomes a way of life. This choice is radically different from objectifying body from psyche, and focusing on what is ‘broken’ about us, and then, striving to “spiritually” improve on it. I have certainly succumbed to this strategy most of my life.
When we touch, or are touched by, another while relaxing all need to fix anything, and instead, humbly attune to the wisdom of life’s ever-unfolding flow of sensations that emanate from within the body, we discover our authenticity. Touching the body’s inner wisdom unites the parts as a whole, which leads us to the inner calm of being cradled by Love. We realize Presence as our heart essence: accepting Life-as expression of Love, we cease controlling, and trust that Love can manage us, and all that is, perfectly well without our help, so we relax and let it be.
We experience that the capacity to face ourselves – and trust this very moment – as it is – and to let it be – is facilitated by the simple power of human touch. We learn to stand as feeling witness to our own humanity, and to serve as a silent witness in support of others. Essentially, the mystery of touch is a powerful means for mutual body-to-body transmission of the sensations of unconditional Love.